Dumb fuck sees stunt video, sets himself on fire

Inspired by a video he saw on YouTube, Russell Gortzig set himself on fire. (WESH.com)

* Dumb Fuck Alert *

And the mother, evidently a dimwit herself, is pointing the finger at YouTube.

By the way, hats off to Florida for doing it again as the birthplace, or eventual destination, of many of the nation's most notorious dumb and sick fucks. It's either that or the scope of local news coverage throughout the state is unparalleled. In any case, the host of Disney World never fails to entertain.

A teenager from Deltona reportedly was hospitalized today after suffering multiple burns while imitating a video of a stunt posted on YouTube.

The 13-year-old dunce, Russell Gortzig, said his friend siphoned gasoline from a riding lawnmower and poured it on him, and that though the lighter was held away from his body, a combination of the spark and fumes set his shorts on fire burning off the skin on his leg. He's recovering in a hospital.

The proud mother, Linda McCrea, said the boys were trying to copy a stunt they saw on YouTube in which a man in a banana suit lights himself on fire, and warned other parents to closely monitor the online activities of their children. Just like she did?

Here's what irks me the most: she's blaming YouTube for her son's pain and wants the website to tighten its user guidelines. She seems to believe her son's IQ and her parenting skills had nothing to do with it. And what makes her think she's entitled to tell YouTube what to do because of what her kid did to himself? The nerve...where does it come from?

If the video alone were the cause of such stupidity, everyone who saw it would set him/herself on fire.

A YouTube representative reportedly said that 20 hours of video are posted on the website each minute and that although YouTube cannot screen postings in advance, users can flag potentially dangerous videos. I think it's absurd for YouTube to even bother explaining itself in a situation like this, as it might give the impression that it owes an explanation.

Frankly, it never ceases to amaze me--and perhaps that's my problem--how people in this country find it so difficult, so painful and impossible to take responsibility for their actions and instead find it so easy to point the finger at someone or something else. In accidents, rather than take a moment to look into how they might have contributed to what happened, they use the moment to find lawyers and file lawsuits.

So I can't help but wonder if it has dawned on the mother that her son acted stupidly when he chose to bathe in gasoline and ignite a lighter. I suppose blaming the website for the foolish behavior of her offspring is more convenient and less shameful.

I also wonder if she has bothered to notice that a video of a stunt on YouTube is no different to those shown on network TV, cable TV, movies, ads, comic books, and video games--source of the most violent videos and a favorite hobby of boys.

Inspiration for dangerous acts abounds nearly everywhere we look. So when a person acts on such inspiration, should the inspiration be blamed and the person spared?

Source: WESH.com/Orlando
Copyright © 2009, Primetime Oracle
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New motive expected in murder of Florida couple

Escambia County Sheriff David Morgan (right) comforts Ashley Markham, 26, daughter of Melanie, 43, and Byrd Billings, 66, after announcing additional arrests in the investigation of her parents' murder. (AP photo)

I knew it...it had to be.

I've been saying all along that there had to be a motive other than robbery in the double murder of Melanie and Byrd Billings, a wealthy couple known for adopting special-needs children, who were shot in their bedroom during a home invasion on July 9.

Sheriff David Morgan said today that police will reveal another motive this week after talking to three more people, noting he plans to make at least one more arrest before he winds down the investigation in a few days, CNN reported.

The sheriff isn't saying much, yet. But according to a report published by the Pensacola News Journal, documents reveal that Leonard Patrick Gonzalez Jr. told authorities Byrd Billings gave him money to help open a martial arts studio.

Here we go...

Eight suspects have been arrested in connection with the case, with seven charged with murder and one with accessory after the fact.

The seven entered the house, located in Beulah, Florida, shot the couple, and stole a safe containing prescription medication, family documents and some jewelry of sentimental value.

Several federal agencies have been involved in the investigation, including the FBI, the Drug Enforcement Administration and the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives.

Morgan said that he expects to interview Gonzalez' wife today.

For background and additional info check out previous posts on this story:

Florida thugs didn't need to kill the Billings to rob them, posted July 16
Sick Fuck of the Week, posted July 19
Suspects arrested in murder of Florida couple, posted July 13

Sources: CNN, Pensacola News Journal, Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Copyright © 2009, Primetime Oracle
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Sick Fuck of the Week

So it's that time again...time to recognize the work of the evil or deranged...or both...a.k.a. sick fucks.

Although the biggest crime story this week continued to be the slaying of the turbo-adopting parents near Pensacola, Florida, I'm not inclined to bestow the Sick Fuck of the Week award upon the eight people involved because, in all honesty, what they deserve is a dumb fuck or stupid fuck award.

It took them a month of pseudo-ninja training with a Rambo-wanna-be sick fuck who teaches self-defense to children (of all things...) to be able to "break into" (the door was unlocked) a house, shoot the Billings point blank (um...why?) and steal a safe with nothing but documents, the kids' prescription medications and some jewelry "of sentimental value" (that is, nothing fancy). Genius.

These imbeciles trained as though they were breaking into the White House just to rob a Florida house with eight or nine children in it, a 66-year-old man with no history of violence and a 43-year-old loving mother of 17. WTF?

How much military training and rehearsing do you need to walk into a house and shoot a couple while they sleep?


Furthermore, by killing the Billings these trigger-happy ninjas added first-degree murder charges to what would've amounted to home invasion and armed robbery.

I'll tell you what these morons must've done for their so-called training: ringleader Leonard Gonzalez Jr. plugged them into warfare video games matrix-like for a month-long warm-up slaying animated soldiers, ninja fighters and zombies with no consequence, hoping to grow their testicles for nothing but an "operation" that one of Gonzalez's self-defense students could've carried out with half his brain tied behind the back. Stupid fucks.

As if that weren't enough, after all that preparation, one of these boneheads forgot or failed to disable the house's video surveillance system, and their intricate (not!) undertaking was caught on tape.

As a result, I have no choice but to award the Sick--no--Dumb Fuck of the Week award to the eight suspects in the Billings double murder case.

All that ninja training will go down the drain, literally, when they meet a bar of soap and inmates Bubba, Billy Bob, Bobby Joe, Dwayne, Jim Bob, Roy, Tyler, Betty Jo and Martha Mae at the showers...if you ask me.

From top left, Leonard Patrick Gonzalez Jr., Leonard Patrick Gonzalez Sr., Wayne Thomas Coldiron, Gary Lamont Sumner, a juvenile whom police did not identify; Frederick Lee Thorton Jr., 19; and Donnie Ray Stallworth, 28. (AP Photo/Escambia Sheriff's Department)


Real estate agent Pamela Laverne Long, left, was charged with accessory after the fact in the murders of Byrd and Melanie Billings near Pensacola, Florida. (Okaloosa Sheriff's Office/AP)

Copyright © 2009, Primetime Oracle
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Florida thugs didn't need to kill Billings to rob them

It doesn't add up, if you ask me.

One of the top stories in the U.S. for the past week has been the murder of a Florida couple known for having adopted about a dozen kids, most of them disabled. At one time they had 17 children.

Melanie and Byrd Billings (left) where shot to death in their bedroom on July 9 by a group of Ninja-wanna-be thugs now in custody.

The only motive so far given for the killings is home invasion and robbery. (See Suspects arrested in murder of Florida couple, posted July 13.)

But that can't possibly be the whole story, can it?

First of all, the sheriff said that robbery was "a motive"--that is, one of possibly several motives--but he would not elaborate.

Today, it was reported that the so-called the "pivotal person" in organizing the crime, Leonard Gonzalez Jr., a 35-year-old self-defense teacher with a wife and kids, and six other suspects trained for the crime for a month prior to its execution, and that the surveillance video that captured them enter the property was supposed to have been disabled by one of them--oops.

Here's the thing:

Why rehearse for a month to break into a house, go straight to a bedroom, shoot two people, grab a couple of things and go? How hard is that?

More difficult–and requiring more thought and rehearsal–would’ve been to plan a robbery without anyone in the house noticing. Even if the Billings woke up, a couple of masked robbers could’ve held them at gunpoint while the others took whatever they came to get.

In other words: there was no need to kill the Billings in order to rob them.

That would make murder not a means to an end, but an end in itself.

Five or six of them entered the house, located west of Pensacola in Beulah, so they couldn't have been threatened by a sleeping 43-year-old woman and 66-year-old man.

So far investigators have found no links to drugs, mafia or any illegal activity in the murders.

Then...why?

I've been waiting for someone--anyone--on CNN or anywhere else to ask that question: Why kill them when killing them was not necessary to rob them? And so far no one reporting the story has--not that I've seen or heard or read.

It's driving me nuts! Can somebody please address this issue...pretty please?

Sources: Pensacola News Journal, CNN, AP
Copyright © 2009, Primetime Oracle
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Suspects arrested in murder of Florida couple who adopted a dozen-plus kids, most of them disabled

The Billings family (Pensacola News Journal) Leonard Gonzalez Jr. and Wayne Thomas Coldiron have been charged with the murder of Byrd and Melanie Billings. (Pensacola News Journal)

Four days ago a couple with more than a dozen children, most of them adopted and disabled, was shot to death in their Florida house.

Yesterday arrests were made, with more to come, meaning we now have enough information to present this week's first candidates to the Sick Fuck of the Week award.

A surveillance video the couple used to keep track of the kids, shows a red van pull up, three men get out and head to the house at the time Melanie, 43, and Byrd Billings, 66, were murdered in their bedroom on July 9.

Discovery of the red van across town led to the arrest of 56-year-old Leonard Gonzalez (left), who reportedly was the getaway driver. He's been charged with tampering with evidence because he was in the process of painting or disguising the van. Shouldn't he be charged with accessory to murder? Bail was set at $250,000.

Sunday night, police arrested 41-year-old Wayne Coldiron and 35-year-old Leonard Gonzalez Jr., son of the van owner, (below) and charged them with murder, robbery and home invasion, holding them on $1 million bail each.

At the time, Escambia County Sheriff David Morgan described the murder as something out of a movie.

"This is like a movie script," he said. "The more we've delved into this and worked this case, the different avenues that it would go down. Just when you thought, 'All right, we're in a straight line at this point with this investigation,' it would take a hard right or a hard left, and it was almost as though you had another investigation that you were initiating."

At a press conference today, Morgan said investigators believe six to eight individuals were involved in the murder, including three black males, one of which is is flight and yet to be identified.

Regarding the motive, Morgan would only confirm one--robbery.

"We have a motive, but we believe that there are other motives, numerous motives...but at this time we cannot release that information," he told reporters.

Morgan said the mastermind of the operation is already in custody, but would not disclose his name.

What other motives could there be? What could the adoptive parents of a dozen handicapped children have done to provoke these sick fucks? One of the couple's biological children, Ashley Markham, said today the family doesn't know the suspects.

Could the wholesome-looking, generous couple had been involved in something sinister? It seems far-fetched, but you never know...

This case is already starting to look like a Law & Order...not that there's anything wrong with that. As you can see, I'm tuning in.

The Billings originally had 17 children, but three died over the years, Markham said. Each parent had two biological children, and the rest were adopted; the couple had no biological children together. Nine of the children were at home when the couple was shot and killed Thursday night.

The family lived in Beulah, west of Pensacola, near the Alabama state line.

UPDATE: A day after this post, on July 14, sheriff Morgan announced seven people had been arrested in connection to the murders.

Morgan declined to give specifics about the suspects, saying only that some may have been laborers at the couple's home but noting there's "no direct tie" between the suspects and the couple. He also declined to answers many questions, repeatedly saying, "I won't speak to that issue," because of the ongoing investigation and because other states are involved.

The prosecutor said the primary motive in this case was "home invasion and robbery," but he declined to disclose the other motive or motives earlier referred to by Morgan or provide specifics about the items stolen, though he confirmed a medium-sized safe was among them.

"A lot of the questions, you, the media, is asking we just cannot answer," he said.

Leonard Gonzalez, Jr., was identified as the organizer of the crime.

Sources: Pensacola News Journal, CNN, ABC News, AP
Copyright © 2009, Primetime Oracle
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2-year-old strangled by 9-foot pet python

Wildlife officials capture the snake that killed the child. (Tom Benitez/Orlando Sentinel)

A 2-year-old girl from Oxford, Florida, was strangled to death by a 9-foot pet python.

A man woke up Wednesday morning and found his girlfriend's 2-year-old daughter being strangled by his pet Burmese python, Sumter County sheriff's officials said according to a CBS News report.

WTF is up with people having dangerous animals around kids? Can you imagine the suffering this baby went through being squeezed to death by a snake? For crying out loud!

The fatal incident occurred at about 10 a.m. at the residence, some 60 miles northwest of Orlando, when the snake apparently escaped from its cage overnight and strangled the girl, who was also bitten on the forehead, deputies said.

OMG! That must have been a gruesome sight.

Charles Darnellv stabbed the animal, which was wrapped around the girl's neck, and pulled the girl away before calling 911, deputies said.

Emergency workers could not revive the girl, whose death is now under investigation.

Darnell also owns a boa constrictor (wonderful), and the snakes have not been removed from the house, deputies said. (Snakes? Does that mean the python is still alive?)

The only way you can have such a snake is locking it in a cage--right? Then what's the fucking point? What's the point of having a large snake only to have to restrict its space to a cage that could never be large enough for a reptile meant to be out in the wild? What's the point of having such a pet? Oh...right...he gets to show it off as part of his king-of-the-jungle manhood to his buddies over beers. WTF?

The 2-year-old girl's mother, Jaren Hare, was also inside the home (left) at the time of the incident, deputies said.

I wonder if his snakes were part of the attraction...

Matt Harrison, a Critter Control employee who has worked with pythons for more than eight years, said the animals are extremely strong. (Nah...ya think?)

"A 12-foot snake is kind of like having a truck sitting on your chest. They have enough power not only to asphyxiate you, but to break bones as well," said Harrison, who added that stabbing a python would not force the animal to release its prey.

He suggested throwing alcohol down the snake's throat or running hot water over it to get it to release its prey.

Prey. Just think what would've been like to wake up to find the python half-way into devouring the baby. Jeez...

Harrison urged owners to be careful with pet pythons.

"Most (of) the time, as long as you're careful, you don't have anything to worry about, but occasionally, they can turn on their owners," he said, noting attacks tend to be a feeding response and stressing that cages should be kept secure and safe especially around children.

It is outrageous to me that such common sense should have to be pointed out from an expert.

Harrison speculated that there are more pythons in Florida than anywhere else in the U.S. (there are also more...never mind--no comment).

According to the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission, pythons are a nonnative species to Florida, although some Burmese pythons have been found in parts of Florida, CBS News reported.

An invasion of giant Burmese pythons in South Florida that made national headlines last year was "rapidly expanding" and expected to reach Central Florida, according to a University of Florida study.

It will be interesting to see if the incident will be written of as an accident, given that it was an accident, or if negligence will be found and either one or both of the adults be held responsible for what happened.

Sources: CBS News
Copyright © 2009

Man guilty of failing to fake his death

Photos of Marcus Schrenker, compiled by TheWeeklyVice.com

A money manager pleaded guilty on Friday to federal charges stemming from a plot to fake his own death in a small plane crash in Florida in an attempt to avoid financial fraud charges in Indiana, Reuters reported Friday.

Marcus Schrenker, 38, parachuted out of his plane over Alabama in January and let it continue to fly on autopilot before it eventually crashed in Florida. He was arrested a day later at a Florida campsite and taken to a hospital with wounds to his wrists that apparently resulted from a suicide attempt.

OK, can someone please explain to me how a money manager--whom one would expect to be of above average intelligence given the demands of his job--thought he could fake his own death in a plane crash without a body? Poor planning, my friend. But, then again, he got caught with his pants down and charged with financial fraud, so maybe he wasn't smart enough to be a money manager to begin with. If indeed he had tried to kill himself prior to the hoax, could that have been his first attempt at faking his death?

Schrenker was wanted in Indiana on fraud charges alleging that he misled people who invested money with his financial management companies and that he misappropriated hundreds of thousands of dollars, Reuters reported.

In U.S. District Court in Pensacola, Florida, Schrenker pleaded guilty to two charges, deliberately crashing a plane and placing false distress calls. His trial had been scheduled to start on Monday. His sentencing was set for Aug 19, according to the report.

Authorities say Schrenker radioed a distress call from his single-engine Piper aircraft, reporting that the plane's cracked windshield had imploded and that he was bleeding.

So he has a flair for drama.

Two rescue helicopters and two military F-15 fighter jets were dispatched. When the jets caught up with the plane as it continued to fly with no one aboard, the windshield was intact, the door was open and there was no sign of the pilot, investigators said.

One has to laugh. The last this dude expected was the windshield to not crack after the plane fell from the sky. He also forgot to close the door behind me. Bad manners, if you ask me.

The Piper crashed in a swampy, wooded area north of Milton, Florida.

He's lucky his pilot-less plane did not crash in a highly populated area; otherwise, he would be facing manslaughter charges. *sigh* What a dunce.

When rescuers reached the scene, they found evidence including a book of campsites in America missing its pages on Alabama and Florida, and a list scribbled on the back of a book stating, "cracked windshield, window imploded, bleeding profusely," a court affidavit said.

OMFG, this just keeps getting better and better! Turns out he truly was--is--a dunce! He actually needed to write down the three--count them, three--things he would say when radioing for help. Are you kidding me?

Schrenker parachuted safely to the ground near the Alabama city of Harpersville, convinced a police officer to give him a ride to a hotel and then fled, police said. He previously had stashed a motorcycle near the hotel and got away before local police learned of the plane crash.

Is this for real? So, he lands and takes a ride from--of all people--a cop? Jeez!

He still faces the financial fraud charges in Indiana, Reuters reported.

He should be charged with reckless stupidity, if you ask me.

Sources: Reuters
Copyright © 2009